December 18, 2012 - normal day at work, except for having a cold. On my drive home I get a phone call from my OB/GYN so I pull over to answer the call. Good thing too because no "hi Ms. Guilbeaux is this a good time" just lets read from a report with no emotion all this medical gibberish. The word cancer never came out of her mouth until I asked " Are you telling me I have cancer?" The response was yes. Don't remember much after that except thinking "did she call the right patient.". After all, I'm only 35! How can I have cancer?! Got home & had to figure out how in the hell am I gonna tell my parents I have cancer. That was the worst phone call I've ever had to make in my entire life! After talking with my family we came to the agreement that I had to have the best care in the world which means MD Anderson will be my caretaker. Made several calls that night to family & close friends to give them the shocking news. The common response from everyone was "OMG! I am so sorry. I'm in shock & don't know what to say." Trust me, I feel the same way.
The fear of thinking your gonna die. You know you not alone, but at that time you feel more alone then you ever have in your life. At that moment is when you have to make a decision: Am I going to feel sorry for myself & push people out of your life or are you going to embrace the ones around you & be positive? Anyone who knows me knows which path I took. I decided to embrace & be positive. And as a bonus feature (because we all love bonus features) I decided to add humor to the situation. Granted it took me about a week for the humor to come into play, but better late than never right?
I'm catching up on your BLOG posts now. I love that you are sharing via posts. A great way to get the news out while avoiding the repitition of it all. I'm very proud of you for your positive spirit. And of course, I love you.
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